The word that will send any student running towards the nearest thing they find comforting/relaxing. It's a time of great stress, especially us college students.
I could seriously not give a fuck about finals right now. I don't think I could give a fuck about anything at this point. That is the level of my apathy. I'm so stressed out my body has shut down and entered a stage of numbness.
I suppose part of the reason for this is I don't even know if I'm going to be able to return next semester. I still owe the school $4ooo, and I have no idea how I'm going to pay for it. The school won't let me register for class until I have that money. And I can't call the financial office because every time I even think about calling them I go on the verge of a panic attack. I plan on just going to their office and waiting until someone sees me, but who knows how well that will work.
If I can't come back next semester it's bye Chicago and Columbia College, probably won't see you until I graduate from California community college. This is the worst case scenario because it basically means I'm a failure. And when only a handful of your graduating class moves out of town/state it just sort of magnifies the failure.
This was my dream and it's crashing down around me at the moment. I just hope it'll still be salvageable.
